What can you do if nothing changes? Nothing really helps. I am still so damn stuck on you. And I know it’s stupid and unhealthy. But my mind can’t convince my heart to just let go.
Everything could be so much easier if you weren’t so damn likeable. But you are – so fucking nice and sweet. And I like you. Even without all the attraction. So much I almost believe I could be your friend.
But friends do not fancy each other and I really, really do. It doesn’t matter that I know you don’t think of me that way. Because I do. Really, really do think about you that way. I think you are my punishment for being such a coward before.
Life always gets back at you – I am sure of it now. Why else would I get into the same situation twice? Problem is I still don’t have any desire to learn my lesson. I still can’t let it go.
You don’t want me I am quite sure of that. That girlfriend of yours is a pretty good indicator of how you feel towards me. A sane person would just let it go and get on with her life. Problem is, I have never been sane.
So I am stuck on you. And you like me, I know that. I just more than like you.
“Saying his name stabbed my heart, like someone had ripped through my carefully stitched up world and exposed the infected, pulsing red tissue that I thought was healing. ”
Colleen Houck